In Honor of W's Inauguration

Edappel8@cs.com Edappel8 at cs.com
Mon Jan 22 14:13:59 EST 2001


In honor or W's inauguration, I pass along the following tributes in song an=
d=20
auto bumper sticker:

Everyone sing along now!

The Kennebunkport Hillbillies
(Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies Theme Song)

Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy named Bush.
His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.
He drank like a fish while he drove round all about.
But that didn't matter 'cuz his daddy bailed him out.
DUI, that is. Criminal record. Cover-up.

Well, the first thing you know little Georgie goes toYale.
He can't spell his name but they never let him fail.
He spends all his time hangin' out with student folk.
And that's when he learns how to snort a line of coke.
Blow, that is. White gold. Nose candy.

The next thing you know there's a war in Vietnam.
Kin folks say, "George, stay at home with Mom."
Let the common people get all maimed up and scarred.
We'll buy you a spot in the Texas Air Guard.
Cushy, that is. Country clubs. Nose candy.

Twenty years later little Georgie gets a bored.
He trades in the booze, says that Jesus is his Lord.
He said, "Now the White House is the place I wanna be."
So he called his daddy's friends and they called the GOP.
Gun owners, that is. Fallwell. Jesse Helms.

Come November 7, the election ran late.
The kin folks said, "Jeb, give the boy your state!"
"Don't let those colored folks get into any polls."
So they put up barricades so they couldn't punch their holes.
Chads, that is.. Duval County. Miami-Dade.

Before the votes were counted, the five Supremes stepped in.
Told all the voters, "Hey, we want George to win."
"Stop counting votes!" was their solemn invocation.
And that's how George finally got his coronation.
Rigged, that is. Illegitimate. No moral authority.
Y'all come vote now. Ya hear?

*******************************************

 Bush's Inaugural Speech
(to the tune of "What a Wonderful World This Will Be" by Sam Cooke)

Don't know much about history
Don't know much foreign policy
Don't remember how I got through school
I'm sure I didn't break the rules.
But what's it matter 'cause my daddy says
"Boy, if you want to you can be the prez!
What a wonderful world this will be."

Don't know much about the women's vote,
Don't know much about the bills I wrote,
Don't know much about the foreign vets,
I've never voted for 'em yet.
But I do know if your dad tries hard
He can get you in the National Guard
And what a wonderful place that can be.

Now I don=E2=80=99t claim to be an A student
But what's wrong with C's?
I think that maybe by knowing the names of my cabinet
I can win their love for me.

Don't know much about air pollution,
Don't know much about the constitution,
Don't know much about th' economy,
It never much affected me.
But there's one thing that I know for sure,
If the rich stay rich, and poor stay poor,
What a wonderful world this will be.

Don't know much about the national debt,
I've never had to pay one yet.
If we need to we can sell the States
To the Japanese at discount rates.
But I do know that if things get bad
All I=E2=80=99ll have to do is speed dial dad,
What a wonderful world this will be.

*****************************************

 BUMPER STICKERS (from November/December):

Don't Blame Me - I voted for Gore... I Think

UNPRESIDENTED!

If God Meant Us to Vote, He Would Have Given Us Candidates

Jews for Buchanan

What popular vote?

I voted - Didn't matter

My parents retired to Florida and all I got was this lousy President

Disney gave us Mickey, Florida gave us Dumbo

DON'T THROW AWAY YOUR VOTE........ LET KATHERINE HARRIS DO IT FOR YOU

Who is this Chad guy and why is he pregnant?

Bush trusts the people, but not if it involves counting.

Now do you understand the importance of user-testing?

To you I'm a drunk driver; to my friends, I'm presidential material!

One person, one vote (may not apply in certain states)

I DIDN'T VOTE FOR HIS DADDY EITHER

IT AIN'T OVER 'TIL YOUR BROTHER COUNTS THE VOTES

The election can't be broken. We just fixed it.

The skies (wheeze) of Texas (cough) are upon you! (choke)

George W. Bush: The President Quayle We Never Had

The last time somebody listened to a Bush, folks wandered in the desert
for 40 years

Campaign spending: $184,000,000.
Having your little brother rig the election for you: Priceless

Don't Blame Me! I Voted for BOTH of Them!






--------------------

Everyone sing along now!
Everyone sing along now!

The Kennebunkport Hillbillies
(Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies Theme Song)

Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy named Bush.
His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.
He drank like a fish while he drove round all about.
But that didn't matter 'cuz his daddy bailed him out.
DUI, that is. Criminal record. Cover-up.

Well, the first thing you know little Georgie goes toYale.
He can't spell his name but they never let him fail.
He spends all his time hangin' out with student folk.
And that's when he learns how to snort a line of coke.
Blow, that is. White gold. Nose candy.

The next thing you know there's a war in Vietnam.
Kin folks say, "George, stay at home with Mom."
Let the common people get all maimed up and scarred.
We'll buy you a spot in the Texas Air Guard.
Cushy, that is. Country clubs. Nose candy.

Twenty years later little Georgie gets a bored.
He trades in the booze, says that Jesus is his Lord.
He said, "Now the White House is the place I wanna be."
So he called his daddy's friends and they called the GOP.
Gun owners, that is. Fallwell. Jesse Helms.

Come November 7, the election ran late.
The kin folks said, "Jeb, give the boy your state!"
"Don't let those colored folks get into any polls."
So they put up barricades so they couldn't punch their holes.
Chads, that is.. Duval County. Miami-Dade.

Before the votes were counted, the five Supremes stepped in.
Told all the voters, "Hey, we want George to win."
"Stop counting votes!" was their solemn invocation.
And that's how George finally got his coronation.
Rigged, that is. Illegitimate. No moral authority.
Y'all come vote now. Ya hear?

*******************************************

 Bush's Inaugural Speech
(to the tune of "What a Wonderful World This Will Be" by Sam Cooke)

Don't know much about history
Don't know much foreign policy
Don't remember how I got through school
I'm sure I didn't break the rules.
But what's it matter 'cause my daddy says
"Boy, if you want to you can be the prez!
What a wonderful world this will be."

Don't know much about the women's vote,
Don't know much about the bills I wrote,
Don't know much about the foreign vets,
I've never voted for 'em yet.
But I do know if your dad tries hard
He can get you in the National Guard
And what a wonderful place that can be.

Now I don=E2=80=99t claim to be an A student
But what's wrong with C's?
I think that maybe by knowing the names of my cabinet
I can win their love for me.

Don't know much about air pollution,
Don't know much about the constitution,
Don't know much about th' economy,
It never much affected me.
But there's one thing that I know for sure,
If the rich stay rich, and poor stay poor,
What a wonderful world this will be.

Don't know much about the national debt,
I've never had to pay one yet.
If we need to we can sell the States
To the Japanese at discount rates.
But I do know that if things get bad
All I=E2=80=99ll have to do is speed dial dad,
What a wonderful world this will be.

*****************************************

 BUMPER STICKERS (from November/December):

Don't Blame Me - I voted for Gore... I Think

UNPRESIDENTED!

If God Meant Us to Vote, He Would Have Given Us Candidates

Jews for Buchanan

What popular vote?

I voted - Didn't matter

My parents retired to Florida and all I got was this lousy President

Disney gave us Mickey, Florida gave us Dumbo

DON'T THROW AWAY YOUR VOTE........ LET KATHERINE HARRIS DO IT FOR YOU

Who is this Chad guy and why is he pregnant?

Bush trusts the people, but not if it involves counting.

Now do you understand the importance of user-testing?

To you I'm a drunk driver; to my friends, I'm presidential material!

One person, one vote (may not apply in certain states)

I DIDN'T VOTE FOR HIS DADDY EITHER

IT AIN'T OVER 'TIL YOUR BROTHER COUNTS THE VOTES

The election can't be broken. We just fixed it.

The skies (wheeze) of Texas (cough) are upon you! (choke)

George W. Bush: The President Quayle We Never Had

The last time somebody listened to a Bush, folks wandered in the desert
for 40 years

Campaign spending: $184,000,000.
Having your little brother rig the election for you: Priceless

Don't Blame Me! I Voted for BOTH of Them!

If the encomiums above appear twice, I'm sorry.  One gets emotional at times=
=20
like this.



Ed






--------------------

Everyone sing along now!



More information about the KB mailing list